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    a dream
    By greenflying - Published 7/29/2010

    That's probably why NFL jerseys I have so much trouble falling asleep at night. I turn out the lights, and my head fills with thoughts that Football jerseysbegin to circle madly through my mind. Then I imagine a big eraser inside me where my thoughts are. I rub that eraser across the bustle and buzz, rubbingthrowback jerseys out one memory after another, until only silence remains. Only then can I sink into the luxury of sleep.

     

    But sleep never lasts. Sooner or later a nightmare New Orlean Saints jerseysalways door, she begins to grow. My mother gets bigger and heav­ier in my arms. I can't carry her! I don't have the strength! She gets longer. I ler Minnesota Vikings jerseysfeet drag on the ground, her head drags, 1 can't hold up her middle. I'm just too small and getting smaller. I wake up screaming.

     

    Some of my dreams are so vivid, so full of color, so real that I can'tIndianapolis Colts Jerseys believe I'm dreaming. When I wake up, my eyes are wet with tears. My heart is banging against my ribs. IChicago Bears Jerseys tell myself, It mis only a dream, Farali, only a dream. . . . And it might or might not comfort me. It depends, because I do dream about dead people so much. I stroll with them. I talk with them. New York Giants Jerseys I hold them in my arms.They are all alive inside me, still. My father and grandmother appear to me, and they are reaching out and beckoning to me, murmuring softly, Come, Denver Broncos JerseysFarali. Come be with us now! During the dream these images do not frighten me. I love my father, and I'm so glad to see him. I lis voice comforts me. But when I wake up in the morning, I remember what people say about the dead beckoning to you Cleveland Browns Jerseysin your dreams: that it means you are going to die soon yourself. That's when I tremble.

     

    But it's all in my head. That's what I have to keep telling myself. I'm safe in now . . . and besides, they're New England Patriots Jerseys not all terrible, the dreams I have. Lately, I dream that I've grown wings sometimes. I have feathers. I can fly. I love those dreams! I'm soaring overhead, and people are all pointing to me and exclaiming, Look! It's Farali! She canPhiladelphia Eagles Jerseys fly! Farali can fly!

     

    I wake up with a glad heart then and feel that I am fly­ing in some sense: flying into my future—and yet—the past won't let mc go. Not completely. Not vet.

     


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